Out of Curiosity

Is anyone out there like me, grow up in a bilingual environment, simultaneously exposed to both cultures and therefore is coloured and influenced by both to create some weird mix? I personally grow up with a Western-influenced father and speak English to my father, but I also grow up with a Chinese-influenced mother and speak Chinese to her (how these two met despite these conflicting and colliding cultures escapes me and I don't really want to ask too much). The result is that I'm exposed and ergo absorbed both cultures' values. I listen to both English and Chinese songs, but unlike most people of my age and around me, I do not have an inclination towards one. I read both books, again against the norm because most people have a preference: either only Chinese with occasional English books or the inverse. I read both, rather frequently. I watch both dramas, though I show a preference for Western's.

In my life, I pick and select values I desire from both cultures, which most people do not because they do not grow up like me. The result is that my personality is a little ironic: for instance, I like the West's independence and respect for personal liberty, but I also respect Chinese's value of collectiveness and togetherness. The result is that even though I want to have liberty and, to some extent, freedom to run wild, I also simultaneously wish to work with people in a group to produce an achievement that I could be proud of. But most people do not, they yearn for only one: they either want to be completely free, or they want to work hard in a group together. Hence I always stand out: I want to work in a group, but my presence is often incongruous because the way I work often goes against the norm.

I think growing up and being exposed to both cultures is a blessing in disguise for me, for it coloured me in a unique way I do not think a lot of people enjoy. But sometimes it causes conflicting personalities, and occasional identity crisis.