Disappointment

There's a reason why I always stay true to what I say, because I have been a victim of empty promises and disappointments throughout my life.

Every time people say they want to do something, they wanna give me something, they wanna do something to make me happy, at the end they do not.

They give empty promises. They give false hope. They give me an enormous elation and excitement only to crush it at the end.

It happens all the time, and ya I blame it mostly at him.

I won't say who he is, but I guess you might be able to figure it out.

Every time, all he does is give people a great excitement for something exciting, and then at the end he crushes it.

Even though right now I now he mostly is not true to his word and he rarely does what he says, sometimes I give myself the hope, and give him the benefit of the doubt, that he would in this case true to his word.

I have been stupid for 20 years. I have been stupid to treat myself with this.

Ya, I contribute this to my strong independence. I am always not given what people say they'll give me, so I have learned to grow up fighting to get what I want in my life.

Disappointed. I am also disappointed that even though I grow up like this for 20 years, I can still be disappointed by what I already know would be a disappointment.

This is why I have great difficulties trusting promises. All promises people give me are rubbish. If you cannot be responsible for what you say, go away, get out of my life. I am seriously tired of this shit.